Saturday, November 19, 2011

Obamaville’s Occupy Guidelines

Hanging on one of the tents was the sheet below labeled “Occupy DC Guidelines.”  A transcript of the guidelines follows with appropriate comment (italics).   Liberals (Democrats, Progressives, Socialists, whatever) rarely understand irony, I hope my readers can. 

“These guidelines were consenTed [sic] upon by the General Assembly at Occupy DC-K Street based on proposals by the Safe Occupation Committee and the Guidelines Super Committee”  Very American actually as it implies the consent of the governed which is uniquely American and was a truly revolutionary concept in 1776.  We’re about to give liberals a lesson in consent of the governed in 2012. 

“1. Respect each other, and each other’s stuff and space.”  This is a guideline in the middle of a public park that is being illegally occupied and vandalized by a bunch of spoiled children. 

“2. Practice nonviolence and respect for all.”  Except that is if we don’t get our way.  Occupiers don’t “respect” others that might have wanted to use the park and they revere a person who was injured in a violent reaction by occupiers in Oakland to a lawful action by police. 

“3. Be mindful of how individual actions can affect the movement, the group, or other individuals.”  Laughable on the face of it, these useful idiots can’t avoid discrediting their movement.  That’s been done.  

“4. Be mindful of how the consequences of actions can affect individuals differently based on risk factors (such as race, class, gender identification, immigration status, etc.)”  Liberals remain the most race, class, gender obsessed population in the Nation.  

“5. We consider working class police officers a part of the 99%.  However we will not carry out or enforce their orders that jeopardize the safety of other residents of McPherson Park.  We will strive to maintain each other’s safety without relying on the police.”  They did accept assistance from DC medical technicians while I was there.  The record of drug use, rapes, and other perversions throughout the movement are well documented.  I think they would do well to work a little closer with police. 

“6. Do not inhibit others from being able to speak.”  Except Karl Rove.  He is evil and occupiers don’t think he should be able to talk.  Oh . . . . George Bush shouldn’t talk either, or Herman Cain, or . . . . .oh hell – no Republicans or conservatives should be able to talk, ever.  In particular those TEA folks don’t deserve to talk, but everyone else can talk.  Oh . . . you don’t agree with me.  Shut up. 

“7. Speak in ways that communicate effectively.” Hmmmm . . . All I’ve heard is clichés and bumper-sticker chanting.  Better find a teleprompter. 

“8. Be aware of your own aggressive tendencies and respectfully check other’s aggressive behavior.”  I think that EPA boy broke this rule by impugning the dedication of his fellow travelers because they didn’t want to troop down and picket the EPA.  Certainly Occupy Baltimore wasn’t following this guideline when they tried to prevent Rove from speaking. 

“9. Keep this space clean.”  You be the judge – I think that is exactly what it looks like, a big bottle of piss.  

 “10. Don’t assume anyone’s gender.  When possible go with gender neutral pronouns and nouns, such as friend/comrade instead of brother/sister.”  Come on – this is just goofy.  The girls looked like girls (for the most part) and the boys looked like boys (in a feminine sort of way).  Should we really go around calling each other “comrade?”

“11. While #OccupyDC is reclaiming public space for the public, we will be respectful of others who live in and use these spaces on a daily basis.” You’ve blanketed more than half the park with tents and you’re churning the place into a sty, do you really think that having a guy sweep up the leaves accomplishes this?  

“12. Be considerate of resources, especially for those who need it the most.” That almost sounds Christian in nature.  The difference being charity is voluntary while socialism (welfare, food stamps, Medicaid, etc.) is forced. 

“13. Be an ally.  Take care of yourselves and your friends/siblings/homies in the struggle.”  You guys and gals (Oops, just violated #10) should have gone with EPA boy to protest. 

“14. People with animals: Please check your animals.  Some of us love animals but not everyone does.  Be respectful of people’s different comfort levels with animals.”  I don’t recall seeing any non-human animals. 

“15. Be aware and sensitive to people’s experiences, e.g. traumatic ones. Give a “trigger warning” before you talk about traumatic experiences or describe violence etc.” LOL . . .I don’t even think they know what that means.  "Trigger Warning!"  I think you all are stupid tools of the left.  "End Trigger Warning."

“16. Practice consent—Check before touching or photographing someone (if you shoot something, say something).  Just because we’re in a public space doesn’t mean we want to be photographed.”  By definition wouldn’t this rule out rape?  As for photos – if you make a public spectacle out of yourself, isn’t the entire point of it for someone to notice? 

I guess the only thing missing was some sort of consequence in the event someone violated the guidelines. 

More to come . . . . .


  1. Very funny. Love the comments.

    Amigo, proof once again that you cannot fix P.I.L.E.s

  2. What a list. Seen WAY too many "little yellow bombs" around truckstops and such from the road days. Your guess is correct. I liked the rule about "comrade". THAT one they have right. Since they're most a bunch of communists,that does fit. Good post,CS.

  3. With such thought out and intensely visionary commentary they may become the Founding Fathers of their new nation, Idiotvillageistan! Keep up the good work. This is both extremely hilarious and tragically sad at the same time.

  4. Wonderful piece. I often wonder if their goals will be met:)

    In Chicago, the occupy movement is coming under fire. Not for their protest, but for blocking downtown traffic at 5:00 P.M. on a Friday.

  5. eeeeew to the big bottle of piss.... gross

    but hey, ya know, the world wide occupy protests are a "biblical voice" per the NZ Herald's description (

    .... they are a leftist paper (for a very leftist and socialist loving country)


    I've gone Galt from the madness in the USA but now have to join the battle fighting greenies and socialists pushing for more handouts from a leftist leaning NZ gubmit...

    Next week is 3 year NZ elections to select from either National (center/left) or Labour (far left)... I'll be voting National or perhaps one of the smaller right leaning parties... NZ is MMP so if major party doesn't get a majority, they form a coalition with smaller parties.... its weird... one of the small parties actually on the ballot this year in NZ: "Aotearoa Legalise Cannibas Party"

    I'm not kidding


  6. Hardnox,

    Thanks - it was almost fun trying.

  7. Clyde,

    That's for the comments and for stopping by. Fortunately DC did put out porta-johns otherwise there would be "yellow-bombs" (no doubt brown ones too) all over the park.

  8. Paladin,

    If you choose to visit - the hardest part is keeping a straight face. Thanks.

  9. Johnny,

    The DC protest has been pretty mild. They did screw up traffic on the 17th - but I think it was due to rubber-necking and not because they actually tried to block anything.

  10. Lisa,

    Thanks for the visit and the link. I attend a Methodist Church, this caught my eye in that article:

    "The Methodist Mission's Lifewise agency has provided food to the Aotea Square occupiers since the protest started last month."

    If I find out that our Methodist Church is supporting this madness - I'm going to become a Baptist.

    Good luck in that election. Tell your New Zealanders to get on board and ride the rising Conservative tide.

  11. CS,

    If you decide to become a Baptist remember one important thing:

    Baptists will come over and drink all your booze, but will not have any when you show up at their place.

  12. Tenth,

    That's why I'm currently a Methodist.

  13. A big jug o' piss...the perfect monument to the #ows mentality.

    First they had to steal the jug that can never be used for potable water ever again and, then dump it someplace legally since with all the chemicals I'm sure are floating within that jug are hazmat.

    What a bunch of scumbags.

  14. -Sepp,

    It might be the emblem of the movement.

  15. made a complaint to the WaPo about the unsafe conditions in McPherson Square. I took the liberty of using your fifth photo as evidence, I now realize that I should have asked first, my sincere apologies.

  16. Anon,

    Good thought - I don't mind at all. I'm not sure that the Pravda on the Potomac (WaPo) will do much as they seem to be one of many Occupy cheerleaders.

    Thanks for the visit.